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The Decision

There is an enemy among us. We first noticed it a year ago. They are growing in numbers and destroying our defenses. We tried to get them to change their ways and come back into the fold. They refused. I think, no I demand, as the queen of this domain that we need to take stronger action against them. I have decided that it is time to pull up the drawbridge. I’m not sure how we will weed out the ones that are already here, but they will be scared. There is no help coming from the outside now. They are all alone…… The citizens of this fair land can now rest easy knowing that the walls are now impenetrable.

 

I have decided to go on Tysabri. Yeah! JCV I dare you to show your ugly face! I’m ready!

I can’t wait to feel “normal” again. I just started the paperwork and hopefully it will all be processed rapidly and I can start as soon as possible. I did a healthy amount of research on both Gilenya and Tysabri. And while they both seem to be decent drugs when it comes to less lesions on your MRIs and less symptoms, Tysabri does seem to come out on top. However that is not why I made my decision. Oddly enough, being the sceptic about side effects that I am, you can’t even blame that for my decision. It was the actual effects of the drugs that scared me. As far as I was concerned, my decisions were instant death or slow horrible sick all the time because I have no immune system death. What made me decide to choose Tysabri is the fact that while on this drug I will be constantly monitored. The infusion center that I am using, actually it helps that I joined a study, does blood tests every time that you have an infusion. The study that I joined is about the blood tests. They are monitoring people’s reactions to Tysabri. Right now the research is very promising for me. It says that 0% of people who have come back negative for the JC virus have had any problems with it within the first year. It also says that .03% had a problem with the JC virus who were tested positive for it in the beginning. Again that is all within the first year on Tysabri. My blood test just came back negative for the JC virus. Yeah! I am very confident about taking this drug, at least for the first year. Who knows, maybe in year something new and less life threatening will come out. The drugs for MS management have been coming down the pipeline pretty quick within the last couple of years. I am feeling very confident about my future right now. Which is not an easy thing to talk yourself into, especially since every MRI I have shows more lesions. 😦 Hopefully that is all about to change.

Right now I am looking forward to a Christmas where I am not depressed and I have energy to run around with the kids like I used to. Also if the dizziness went away and I could enjoy a spiked eggnog without getting sick, I would really appreciate that too.

 
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Posted by on October 30, 2011 in Life with MS

 

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MRI

Today is my third MRI. I feel like I should be placing bets on whether or not I’m about to make it 3 for 3. My first 2 MRIs came back with new white spots. I will actually be surprised if this one doesn’t also come back showing new spots. At least the results for this usually come back pretty quick. That is if they are willing to share over the phone. They have been so far, but new doc, new rules right? We shall see.

Things have definitely been worse for me since it was confirmed that the copaxone isn’t working. I am aware that this is most likely a psychological thing and not so much a physical thing. I have always been a big believer in the “knowledge is power” thought process. However right now I would rather go with “ignorance is bliss”. And right now I can’t stop thinking about the Matrix. 🙂 But honestly with everyone giving me the, “Yeah you’re ok RIGHT NOW”. Like there is a ticking time bomb in my brain just waiting to explode.  I think I’d take the other pill.

I’m not expecting my next post will have good news. I am pretty confident that I have decided what route I am going to take medication wise, but not completely. This decision sucks! Next week I am going to a seminar that is being given by the company that makes Gilenya, and my Doc is one of the speakers. That should be interesting. Maybe I’ll learn something new and less scary. Or more likely new and more scary that will help in my decision making.

Most importantly, this time, I am remembering to bring socks to the MRI. 🙂

 
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Posted by on October 11, 2011 in Life with MS

 

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Wish that there was some kind of guarantee.

I went for my blood test today. They took more than I thought that they would but I got some more information. I got to see the infusion room. That was nice. Not as nice as I was expecting, but still nice. Big comfy leather lounge chairs, everyone gets their own flat screen, I can live with that. Especially since you would be sitting there for 2 hours. I didn’t notice any coffee machines though. That might be a deal breaker. 🙂 I have to wait 4 weeks for my results. They said that they would call me when they come in. I think that I am more nervous about those results than I was about finding out that I have MS. Of course that didn’t take 4 weeks. So instead of waiting for the results to come in I am trying to figure out what I would do either way. I have decided that if it comes back negative I will definitely start going on the Tysabri immediately. If it comes back positively though I don’t know what to do. My doc feels that I should go on Tysabri anyway. I am reading very mixed things online about this. I read that one of the things that the blood test tests for is your CD4 levels. I still have to do more research on what that even is, but what they said was that if your CD4 levels go below 500 then they kick you off of the Tysabri. Apparently if you go below 400 you are now pretty much on the cusp of getting PML. But like I said I still have to do more research. . While I was there they told me that they test your blood every time that you come in for an infusion. I’m not sure if it’s because I joined a study having to do with the blood tests or if it is just a precaution that the office does. I asked what happens if the blood test does come back positive. They said that they will just monitor me more closely. What exactly does that mean? I don’t know.

I think that it is very frustrating that my choices for medication right now are the two things that when I was originally picking out a medication I said Yeah right who would take those.

The other choice that I am considering, should I be in trouble of getting PML, is Gilenya. Which is a pill. That may be it’s only redeeming value. It also does not have great side effects. To the point where they are considering pulling it as an option in the US. I don’t even think that it has been out for a year and it is causing serious heart problems. I believe that it was said that right now the dangers of the side effects are not necessarily on a good enough balance with the positive results of slowing down the progression of MS. But again I need to do lots of research.

So this weekend will be;

All the house work I didn’t get to do during the week

Plus about 20 loads of wash that have piled up

And research, lots of research!

This is what happens when I have a busy week and as of recently (due to the November elections) an absentee husband. 😦

 
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Posted by on September 30, 2011 in Life with MS

 

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