12 Sep

There are many different forms of tired.

There’s what I like to call “normal person tired” which is when you feel you have done enough and really just want to chill out for a while. With this tired if you still had things you needed to do you could still do them. Maybe begrudgingly, but still physically capable. A lot of people actually end up getting a “second wind”.

Then there is something else that I have experienced. I call it “new mom tired”. (anyone who has ever used the term “slept like a baby” never met my kids) Of course this form of tired applies for any reason that you aren’t getting any sleep. Every night feels like a huge struggle. You know that you aren’t going to get any sleep, so you try all sorts of different tricks to make it through and each night is a different strategy. Yes, with this tired you are dragging, but could easily perk yourself up if necessary and still totally capable of functioning. Deliriously at times, but still walking and talking and hopefully not making big decisions. = )

Within the last year I have learned a new kind of tired. I really did think that the “new mom” tired was going to be the worst that I would ever experience. I was wrong. Now I have “MS tired” to add to the list. Well maybe not add so much as replace since I am done with the baby scene. So until I am pulling all-nighters because of school, I should be good in that department.

“MS tired” is a strange feeling. I have read a lot of different accounts on what this means to other people. For me it is like being trapped in smoke. I start to have a hard time breathing and I can’t think straight at all. Nothing feels real. It gets very hard to move, a lot of people have said that their legs feel heavy. For me it’s more like my brain has gotten heavy. Like I forgot how to walk. Like I have to remind myself to breath in and out. My brain just seems to loose functioning skills. Not to mention the fact that my eye sight also starts to be not quite as sharp as it should be. I believe that is the original holes showing themselves. Give me a good half hour to an hour to sit/lie down and my brain seems to come back to me, but the recovery ends there. I need a couple of hours of sleep now in order to fully function again. I am definitely done for the day after this.

The most frustrating part is that you never know when it’s going to happen. Some days I can do lots of things and have absolutely no problem. Then other days all it takes is for me to do a little bit of wash and then the rocking starts again and god forbid I don’t heed the warning and slow down. Otherwise the next thing you know I’ll need another 3 hour nap when what I really need to be doing is hopping in the car to pick my son up from school. Really, where is my chauffeur when I need him?

I wish they made an energy drink for this type of tired.

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Posted by on September 12, 2011 in Life with MS


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