Eyes wide open

03 Nov

You know, you look at people and situations differently after you’ve been diagnosed. I have had it pretty easy. I have the least aggressive form of the disease. Well so far that is what they are saying anyway. I guess no one really knows with MS. But for now, I have the least aggressive form. It was diagnosed very quickly. I was diagnosed within a month of my “first” symptom. My symptom wasn’t horrible. My eyes stopped functioning. Which turned into my upper lip starting to lose control. Which made talking and smiling much more entertaining. Or at least for me, who kept laughing at my inability to move certain parts, it did. But most of that is over now. My eyes are to the point that I can drive without any real threat to humanity at large. My lip regained full function again after my first solu-medrol injection. However, I am aware that next time I may not be so lucky. Of course I’m still hoping that there won’t be a next time, but let’s stay serious here. So I look at people differently now. When I see other people in wheel chairs, or with any movement impairments, I watch what they do and how they get around and wonder if I could do that too.

I had a neighbor growing up that ended up in a wheel chair. I never knew why, but I always felt bad for him. He was young. Had just adopted two beautiful little kids that I babysat for. And he had gone from high spirits to being very depressed. I had just figured that he had had a stroke or something. No one ever said what had happened. Well, I just found out that he has MS. Isn’t it funny that you don’t find these things out until you also have the disease? It’s like joining a secret club. Now you are finding out who all the members are. Of course finding out that that was what was wrong with my old neighbor is a little unsettling. Until it actually happens to you, you always think “that will never happen to me”.

So I’m keeping my eyes, and mind, open now. I realize that that can happen to me. Now I just have to make sure that I am prepared for any possible future. Not being morbid, just prepared. I still plan on skipping the depressed parts. I stay optimistic but realistic and am always able to laugh at myself.

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Posted by on November 3, 2010 in Life with MS


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